If you’ve been dating lately and feel like the pool is full of people who aren’t serious, emotionally immature, selfish, entitled, or stuck in perpetual adolescence… you’re not imagining things.
It’s not that all people are low-value. It’s that the modern dating market rewards low-effort, low-integrity behavior—and too many people have adapted to that environment.
So why does it seem like most people out there just aren’t worth your time?
Let’s break it down.
1. Hookup Culture Rewards Surface Over Substance
In a swipe-driven world, attention is currency—and depth is often a liability.
People chase chemistry, aesthetics, and instant gratification over compatibility, character, and shared values.
The result?
Short-term mindsets, endless options, and minimal emotional investment.
A lot of people don’t build connections anymore—they sample them.
You end up meeting versions of people who aren’t interested in growth—just access.
2. Social Media Has Created a Validation Economy
We live in an era where “likes,” attention, and digital clout can feel more valuable than intimacy or loyalty.
Many people no longer pursue relationships—they pursue audiences.
They don’t want love. They want to be desired, admired, and chased… by many.
This creates emotionally unavailable, commitment-avoidant people who view relationships as ego boosts, not partnerships.
And if they always have options in their inbox, they have no incentive to actually show up for one person.
3. People Want High Standards Without Doing the Work
Low-value isn’t just about bad behavior. It’s also about lack of effort, lack of growth, and lack of self-awareness.
Everyone wants a loyal, attractive, emotionally mature, financially stable, ambitious partner—yet few people are willing to become that kind of person themselves.
This creates a mismatch: high expectations paired with low personal investment.
That’s entitlement, not readiness.
4. Healing Is Optional—And Most People Skip It
A lot of people enter the dating market:
-Unhealed from past trauma
-Emotionally reactive
-Carrying baggage they refuse to unpack
-Playing out old wounds with new partners
Low-value doesn’t always mean someone’s a bad person.
Sometimes it means they haven’t done the inner work to be a good partner.
They think dating will fix their loneliness or insecurity—but unhealed people don’t connect. They collide.
As the old saying goes…
Hurt people, hurt people.
5. Too Many People Want the Perks Without the Responsibility
Everyone loves the idea of love—the support, the sex, the companionship, the aesthetic.
But commitment?
Accountability?
Conflict resolution?
Emotional labor?
Crickets.
Low-value people want relationship benefits with single-person freedom.
They want someone to care deeply—while they stay detached.
This mentality is behind the end of many failed marriages and relationships in the modern era.
Too many people want the title and privileges of being a husband, father, wife, mother, but when it gets too real? They disappear.
6. Modern Dating Encourages Passive Consumption, Not Active Pursuit
Apps have made dating feel like shopping. You don’t pursue a person—you scroll.
You don’t invest—you dabble.
This creates emotionally lazy behavior. People don’t feel the need to:
-Follow through
-Communicate clearly
-Take initiative
-Be intentional
Low-value behavior thrives when connection becomes convenient, not earned.
Final Thought:
Not everyone is low-value. But many people are stuck in patterns that keep them low-value—emotionally, mentally, and relationally. And the modern dating culture not only enables it—it often rewards it.
The good news?
High-value people still exist. They’re just rare—and often harder to spot because they’re not loud, flashy, or playing the game.
So don’t lower your standards.
Just sharpen your discernment.
And remember: the goal isn’t to be desired by everyone. It’s to be respected by someone real.
Quality still exists. It just doesn’t advertise itself the way chaos does.
Remember, chaos “feels exciting.” Stability “feels like boredom.” Nothing worthwhile can be achieved in chaos. Foundations only work when they are stable.
-The Rational Ram
The Rational Ram 