There’s a lot of talk—especially online—about the rise of single mothers. I wrote a recent post about how there is a “wrong way” to become a single mother.
The wrong paths to single motherhood, poor choices, are often cited by denizens of the so-called manosphere to assign blame solely to women:
“They picked the wrong guy”
“They should’ve made better choices”
“They’re just looking for child support.”
But here’s the truth that gets conveniently ignored:
Irresponsible men play a massive role in creating the very situation they love to criticize.
🧬 It Takes Two to Make a Child
This isn’t revolutionary. It’s basic biology.
If a woman is a single mother, that means:
–A man fathered a child
-A man failed to stay, support, or take responsibility
You can’t complain about “baby mamas” and ignore the “baby daddies” who walked away.
You don’t get to mock the fire you helped start.
🔄 The Cycle of Blame and Abandonment
Here’s the cycle we often see:
-A man pursues a woman (often carelessly or for purely sexual reasons)
-He doesn’t use protection or take precautions
-A pregnancy happens
-He disappears, denies, or downplays his role
-Then he joins the chorus of men bashing “single moms”
That’s not accountability.
That’s cowardice.
⚖️ Accountability Isn’t Gendered
Yes, women have a responsibility to be discerning with whom they sleep with and who they allow into their lives.
But men have a responsibility, too:
-To use protection
-To vet the women they sleep with
-To take fatherhood seriously
-To be present, even when it’s inconvenient
You can’t brag about your masculinity and then flinch at the consequences of your choices.
🚫 “She Trapped Me” Isn’t a Get-Out-of-Jail-Free Card
Even if a woman had ulterior motives, one fact remains:
No woman can get pregnant without your involvement.
If you didn’t want a child, you had options:
-Don’t sleep with her
-Wear protection
-Vet her character beforehand
If you chose not to, that’s not entrapment. That’s recklessness.
👶 The Child Didn’t Ask for This
At the end of the day, there’s a child involved—
One who now grows up without a consistent father because two adults made short-sighted choices.
And while society continues to point fingers at the mother, the father fades into the background—often free from the same social scrutiny or judgment.
💬 Final Thought
You can’t complain about the fruit of a tree you helped plant.
If you’re a man who contributed to fatherless homes, your first responsibility isn’t commentary—it’s correction.
Yes, some women make poor choices.
But so do many men.
And until men hold each other accountable for the children they help create, they’ll continue to contribute to the very problems they rant about.
You’re not just responsible for where you finish. You’re responsible for what you leave behind.
-The Rational Ram
The Rational Ram 